Sibling Abuse in Adoptive Homes; a therapist’s view
Over the course of my 32 years of working with adoptees, I’ve seen sibling abuse many times. A lot. Usually it’s kept quiet. Adoptive parents also do not report this and the adoptee feels alone with it. I have numerous theories on why this develops between siblings but this article is on what I’ve developed as my clinical response.
When working with an adoptee who lives in a home with sibling abuse, a therapist should focus on the following areas:
1. Safety and Stability: Prioritize the immediate safety of the adoptee. Assess the living situation and work on creating a safety plan, ensuring the child feels secure in their environment. *report abuse
2. Emotional Expression: Encourage the adoptee to express their feelings about the abuse and their experiences. Provide a safe space for them to share their thoughts, fears, and emotions without judgment.
3. Understanding Adoption Identity: Help the adoptee explore their identity as an adopted child. Discuss any feelings of loss, abandonment, or confusion related to their adoption, and how these feelings may intersect with their experiences of sibling abuse.
4. Coping Mechanisms: Teach healthy coping strategies to manage stress and trauma. This might include mindfulness, grounding techniques, or creative outlets like art or writing to help process their emotions.
5. Family Dynamics: Explore the dynamics within the family and the role the adoptee plays. Discuss the impact of sibling relationships and how the abuse affects their sense of belonging and connection with others.
6. Building Resilience and Support: Focus on building the adoptee's resilience and support networks. Encourage the development of friendships and supportive relationships outside the family, as well as fostering positive self-esteem and self-worth.
By focusing on these areas, a therapist can provide comprehensive support to an adoptee navigating the complexities of sibling abuse within their home.
In kindness,
Amy xx